Starting college can be a new and exciting experience. It’s full of possibilities: new friendships, new classes, and a fresh start in a new place. But alongside all that excitement, being in a new environment with newfound independence can sometimes feel isolating and lonely, and you may find yourself missing your friends and family quite a bit. The transition from home to college is big, and it can stir up a lot of emotions. You’re not alone in feeling this way. In fact, it’s something that most college students will experience at some point.
If you’re finding yourself missing your family, friends, and the comfort of home, know that these feelings are valid. Adjusting to life in a new environment can take time, but there are ways to cope with homesickness and loneliness in a healthy, constructive way. Here some ways you can work through this feeling.
1. Acknowledge Your Feelings
The first step in dealing with homesickness and loneliness is to simply acknowledge how you’re feeling. It’s okay to miss home. It’s normal to feel lonely in a new place. Don’t push those emotions away or tell yourself to "just get over it." Being kind to yourself is crucial. Let yourself feel what you’re feeling, without judgment. Missing home does not mean you aren't ready for this step in your life, only that you are experiencing a natural part of going through change.
2. Stay Connected with Home (But Don’t Overdo It)
It’s tempting to call home every day when you’re feeling lonely, and while there’s nothing wrong with staying in touch with family and friends, it’s important to strike a balance. Constantly checking in with home can sometimes make you feel more homesick. Instead, set up a regular schedule—maybe once or twice a week—where you connect with your loved ones. This will give you something to look forward to, but also help you gradually adjust to being independent in your new environment.
3. Create New Routines
One of the hardest things about moving to college is the shift in your daily routine. Your surroundings and responsibilities change, and with that, so does the structure of your life. Creating a new routine—whether it’s through exercise, studying, or finding time for hobbies—can help you regain a sense of control and stability. Establishing regular habits helps ease the transition and fosters a sense of accomplishment that can lift your mood.
4. Find Your Support Network on Campus
You’re not alone in feeling lonely. Many students experience the same sense of isolation, especially during the first few
weeks or months, or during holiday seasons. The good news is that most campuses are filled with resources to help you connect with others. Look for clubs, organizations, or events that interest you. Joining a group of like-minded people is a great way to make new friends and start to feel more comfortable and at home. It’s also worth checking out campus counseling services if you feel that loneliness is starting to affect your mental health.
5. Make Your Space Feel Like Home
Your dorm room or apartment is your new home, and it can help to make it feel like a place where you belong and feel comfortable. Decorate it with items that bring you comfort like photos of family, your favorite books, cozy blankets, or even a familiar scent like a candle. Small touches of home can have a big impact on your mood and help create a comforting space where you can relax and recharge.
6. Get Involved and Explore
Sometimes, the best way to deal with loneliness is to dive into activities that take you out of your head and into the world around you. Explore your campus and the surrounding area. Join events or activities that interest you, like a fitness class, a student-run event, an art show, or even a bike/walk through nature. The more you immerse yourself in your new environment, the more you’ll start to feel like it’s your own. And with time, you may realize that your college town or city can offer a sense of belonging, just like home.
7. Practice Self-Care
Taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally is essential when you’re feeling homesick, and they are all connected. Be sure to eat well, exercise regularly, and get enough sleep. It’s also important to make time for activities that nurture your emotional well-being, like journaling, practicing mindfulness, or spending time outside. Taking a walk, meditating, or even just sitting quietly with a cup of tea can provide a break from the feelings of loneliness.
8. Give Yourself Time
This may be one of the most important. Adjusting to college life doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time to settle into your new routine and create a sense of belonging. Don’t rush the process or expect to feel "at home" right away. It’s completely normal for it to take weeks or even months. Be patient with yourself and understand that your feelings of homesickness and loneliness are part of the transition. Over time, you will begin to adjust and things will get easier, and you will start to build connections and feel more settled.
9. Consider Professional Support if Needed
If your feelings of homesickness or loneliness are persistent and starting to interfere with your ability to function, focus, or enjoy your college experience, it may be helpful to speak with a counselor. Many campuses offer free or low-cost counseling services, and talking to a professional can provide you with tools to manage your emotions and feel more connected. Know that they are there and happy to help, and that you don’t have to handle everything on your own.
10. Remember, This Is a Phase
Lastly, remember that feeling homesick and lonely is a temporary part of the college experience. As time goes on, the unfamiliarity will fade, and your new life will start to feel more like home. You’ll form friendships, gain confidence, and develop a deeper connection to the place you’re in. College is a journey of growth, and although the beginning can be tough, it’s also filled with opportunities to discover new things about yourself and the world around you.
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College is an exciting time, but it’s also a time of transition. Feeling homesick or lonely doesn’t mean you’re not cut out for college or that something is wrong with you. It’s a sign that you’re adjusting to a new and unfamiliar chapter in life. With time, patience, and a little bit of self-compassion, you will start to find your place and build your new "home" away from home.
Take it one step at a time, and remember, you’re not alone. You’ve got this!
Brianna Dennis-McCrory
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